Sunday Prayer (Trinity Sunday)

O Blessed Mystery,

O Triune Puzzle,

grant us the wisdom

to be at peace with questions

rather than contriving explanations.

We strive to prove ourselves

with a show of truth,

but the glory of Wisdom --

of One who sang the distant stars into being

and who rocks the earth's foundation

to sleep after its long nightmare --

the glory of Wisdom is yours,

without our vain desire for answers.

Now bless us, we pray,

in our uncertainties. Teach us

the peace of the oceans' limitations.

We would strive to measure you as Three;

turn our calculating hearts instead to recognize

the immeasurable length of your grace.

We are yours by your delight,

and we are grateful!

11th Hour Preacher Party: TMI Edition

I have just returned from the General Assembly of the Church of Scotland where I was serving as chaplain to the youth delegates (18-25 year olds). Although days were long and intense, there was much to be encouraged about in the work of God's people engaged in God's mission in Scotland and throughout the world. And reflecting with the young people each day gave me a whole new perspective on the church. Sometimes we get so bogged down in the mundane that we forget to look up and see the stars. I am grateful for all that I learned and shared with these inspiring young people this week.
In our gospel, Jesus tells us "I still have many things to say to you, but you cannot bear them now". I think in text-speak we would call that TMI - too much information. Jesus does not overload us but does give us the Spirit to help us work out the gospel for our day. Isn't that a great comfort - we're not alone in trying to discern what is right for the church in today's world and, although Jesus didn't issue decrees on absolutely everything, the Spirit helps us work out the rest. Oh that we would listen more diligently for the Spirit's voice!
The moderator of the GA based her daily reflections on hope - that same hope that we read of in Romans 5 - hope that does not disappoint us.
So, though weary from a physically and emotionally exhausting week, I am looking forward to preaching that hope tomorrow. How about you?
Join the party and share what you have and ask for what you need and let's do this thing together!

Friday Five: Dogs or Cats or What?

In my experience in the United States, people are either "Dog People" or "Cat People." As the graph above illustrates, not everyone is limited to those types of animals. So I am wondering about pets and experiences with them.

1. Are you a DOG or a CAT person? Or OTHER?

2. Who were the pets of your childhood and what were they like?

3. What pets do you have now?

4. Have you ever had any unusual pets in your household or visit your home?

5. What have you learned from your pets? Give one recent example, if possible.

BONUS: Pictures or anything else related to animals you love.

Please play and tell us in the comments! Go here to learn how to do this.

Thursday Prayer

O God of all creation, you stand as mysteriously behind the forces of nature as you are revealed in the frailty of humankind; accept our prayers for all those who suffer from the ferocity of the winds and the battering of the rains. May you restore all those who are lost to those who love them, give to those who mourn a sure confidence in your abiding love, and fill all of with strength to meet the days ahead with faith, hope, and love, for it is in such that we meet you and act on your compassionate behalf. Amen.

Ask the Matriarch -- Tangled Family Systems

tree tangle

It can be a mess when family trees and church family trees become entangled. Here is this week's question. (Get a cup of coffee. It's a long one.)


I could really use some matriarch advice.  I have a very complicated situation in my church.

In my congregation I have a mother and daughter, both grown, where I have served for two years.  They have had a difficult relationship since long before my coming to this church.  The mother is now very elderly and is beginning to show signs of diminished mental capacity.  Though she has had a long and productive history in the church, her extremely negative attitude has somewhat alienated her from the congregation, and I continually try to reach out to her to bridge the gap.

Her daughter is an active member of our church – driving the church van and teaching Bible study among her many ways of serving - and is generally well liked by the congregation.  She has been unemployed for years and lives in a house owned by the mother (without paying rent, of which the mother continually reminds me).  Recently, the mother called to inform me that she had been served with complaints regarding the property on which her daughter lives.  She has learned that the daughter is now living with a former boyfriend on the property.  The boyfriend has a very bad history with our church and had previously gone to prison.  He is now, I believe, on parole.  Certain things they are doing on the property have caused the complaints.

The mother was very upset about the complaints.  I tried to help by making calls to the county courthouse in an attempt to get answers to questions that she had.  She didn’t use any of the information that I gave her, however.  Instead, she has called a former pastor of the church (two before me, and who has deep, lingering ties) and asked for his help.  This pastor is the executor of her will and I feel reasonably comfortable with his providing legal help as he has brought their shared attorney into the picture.  When I speak to the mother, however, she continually makes references to this pastor being “first” to her, how he helps her and how much he cared about the congregation when he was here, implying that I do not do enough.  These jabs are not atypical of her general negativity, but are still troubling and hurtful.

I have called the daughter, hoping to learn more, but the daughter didn’t offer any information and I was leery of pushing too hard.  The mother says she is planning to sell the house which would likely leave the daughter homeless.  I have thought about trying to get them together to talk with me, but I believe their long and strained history would make their situation far beyond my training in pastoral counseling.  I once suggested to the mother that they bring a professional counselor into the situation, but this resulted in an angry outburst toward me.

My questions are:

1. What exactly is the role of the pastor when it comes to the legal matters of parishioners?  I would like to help, but have little knowledge in this area.
2. How far is too far to step into family situations?  Especially when only one party has invited you in?
3. What is a helpful pastoral role in such a situation?  I try to lend a pastoral ear and offer spiritual support, but it feels woefully inadequate; especially when a previous pastor is stepping in to play the hero.
4. Though our God is a God of grace, what limits do we place on those who teach and lead in our churches?  If the daughter is, in fact, living with her boyfriend, should this mean limiting her leadership role?  Like many small membership churches, we don’t have many volunteers.  Asking her to make a change could have terrible and far-reaching repercussions.  Also, it begs the question of just who among us is worthy to teach or to lead.

I would really appreciate any advice or thoughts you might be able to give on this situation.  Thank you!

Our first answer this week comes from Sarah, blogging at Sarah's Space:

I've re-read your description and questions a few times. What I notice is your own red flags being raised, I think you should pay attention to them. You seem uneasy. I think, rightfully so. I would be very uneasy. The previous pastor is executor and they have a mutual attorney. Let them figure out the legal things.

Like in most small churches, there are so many triangles here I wish we had a space to draw them all on a marker board to talk them all out over coffee, tea, or diet coke. I bet you haven't even had a chance to name them all if these are the ones you are telling us about. It's the best and worst part of small churches and communities. Everyone knows everyone. And everyone is connected to everyone. Or at least it feels that way.

I don't have solid answers to the numbered questions. Here's what I do have:

Don't hold back on the right decision because it will have negative consequences for the church programs. Ultimately, that will hurt more deeply. Do what is right because it is right. Acknowledge that it hurts. And say something like, I'd rather hurt like this now for doing the right thing than hurt more later for not doing the right thing. 

Next we hear from Muthah+, at Stone of Witness:

What a mare's nest you have inherited!  The greatest thing that I would suggest is try NOT to 'fix' this situation.  Your 'previous pastor' may have destroyed any possibility that you have to minister in this situation by over-stepping the bounds of what a pastor should do.  What the pastor is there for is not to save people from themselves.  You are there to bring the Good News that Christ saves.  The bitterness of this mother-daughter feud keeps them from hearing the Good News and that is where the rub comes in. 

In my understanding of my role, I do not have an obligation to get in the middle of family feuds. The triangulation makes the situation worse.  It  keeps them from doing the hard work of getting their lives straight.  You can listen but the thing that you must do is to remind them that they MUST talk to each other in the name of Christ.  The only legal issue you may have to attend to is when the mother becomes incapable of caring for herself and must have an advocate through the state or other agency.  I doubt if you will have to step in here as the previous pastor has already done that.  Continue to assure them of your prayer and when they are ready to make some changes in their relationship, THEN you may be able to help them in ancillary ways. 

These days I do not quibble about living arrangements.  There are too many variables.  There are too many living 'without benefit of clergy' for all kinds of reasons that I choose not to die in that ditch.  If it were to cause a problem in the worshiping community, talk it over on with your board or you pastoral committee. ( I keep thinking of the 78 yr old and the 92 yr old that are living and loving each other and marriage would change their retirement packages so much that it would destroy both of them.) Being sensitive to the financial issues in peoples lives is an important consideration these days.  I had a previous pastor force a couple to marry because they were living together; it was disastrous for them and their children.  

Sharon, who blogs at Tidings of Comfort and Joy, adds these thoughts:

Friedman's book

Dear Compassionate Pastor:

 

You have presented us a classic Edwin Friedman congregational systems situation. I highly recommend his book Generation to Generation: Family Process in Church and Synagogue.  He identifies "the families of the congregation" as being one of the three critical forces in congregational life.   That is why your instincts are *right on* that this is both a pastoral concern and a congregational crisis. You do have a role to play and some effective ways to play it out.

 

1.  Pastors (and former pastors) have no legal role in the off-site matters of parishioners.  Your role as current pastor is to listen, ask clarifying questions, connect them with people &/or groups in the church or community, pray with them, and be the non-anxious presence of Christ as best you are able.

 

2. You can surely go wherever you are invited in order to provide a pastoral presence.  A pastor can also (always!) reach out to someone who hasn't asked.  If you are rebuffed, then let it go.

 

3.  PREVIOUS PASTOR in the mix!  Ack!  Full disclosure: This hits my buttons big time. I have witnessed a lot of damage done to congregations and parishioners and current pastors by former pastors who had every excuse for their behavior with their "friends" except a note from their mother.  I have no patience whatsoever with former pastors (professional church leaders) whose boundaries are too squishy. A pastor (former pastor included) has no business being the executor of a former parishioner's estate.  Ample evidence of inappropriateness on FP's part:  The "Mom" feels OK about saying he is "first" to her.  This is why a pastor needs to leave all former parishioners in every way, for good.

 

Anticipating the rebuttal:  Yes, I have a few actual friendships with people from my previous pastorates with whom I have current, outside-the-local-church interests.  These friendships are sacred and intentional.  We always start with "the talk" and it's this simple:  "[Name of current pastor] is your pastor and my pastoral colleague.  The only thing I want to hear from you about that church is all the ways you are supporting her/him in your ministry together.  This friendship cannot happen for me if I get any idea, from you or anyone, that you are anything less than her/his biggest supporter and cheerleader."  My colleague deserves that, and so do I.

 

Perhaps you can get help or advice from your judicatory.  Mine were not helpful in this regard, but it's worth a try.

 

4.  I am not an "anything goes" kind of person.  Still, you can't impose a standard that hasn't been put in place by the congregation. Minimum qualifications need to be spelled out in a policy that applies to all church leaders &/or teachers.  What about people who smoke or drink or gamble?  What about people who don't tithe or teachers who never go to an adult Bible study to grow their faith?  To those who express concern:  "Sounds like it's time for the ________ (church council, elders, C.E. committee) to talk about our policies."

 

These are my thoughts.  I pray that the ideas you get here today will encourage you and inspire your next steps.

Next we hear from Heidi/RevHRod:

Dear Pastor-

1. I think you answered your own first question.  You don't have extensive knowledge in this area.  You know she has a lawyer.  It sounds like it is going to get stickier before it gets better, so keep referring her back to her attorney.
2. If only one family member wants you to be involved, it is going to be pretty tough to make a lot of headway.  And does she really want you to take action or is she just making a lot of noise?  She seems to have an agenda but I don't think she is looking for a peaceful resolution. 
3. Do you know what it means when a Southern woman says, "Bless your heart?"  She doesn’t mean it. It’s her nice way of telling you to put on your grown up pants and deal with it.  This is the attitude I would suggest you take with the older parishioner.  You are not going to win the popularity contest she seems to be running, and honestly, who'd want to?  I would be doing a lot of the "smile and nod" while saying, "Well, bless your heart.  Isn't it nice that Pastor Yada Yada has been able to help you with this problem." Speaking of Pastor Y, is he retired?  If he is, could you formalize the work he is doing.  If they want him to take care of her, create a format where that is a part of your plan.  If he is actively serving in another congregation, why does he think he can meddle?  I think it is time to figure out what his investment is in this relationship.
4. If you feel it is inappropriate for the younger woman to be serving in a volunteer position given her current living situation, then you need to take action.  Attitudes vary by place, denomination and countless other variables. What might be okay at one church, wouldn't fly at another.  If you take action, make sure that it is a decision of your leadership team and not simply your choice.

And finally, wisdom from earthchick:

Wow! What a complicated situation! You are right that a professional counselor belongs in this situation, but it certainly sounds like that's not a live possibility at this point.

So in terms of what you, as the pastor, can and should do in this situation, here's how I see it:

1 - In terms of legal matters, I would say your role is necessarily limited, both because you have little knowledge, and because: it's not your job! Your job is to be pastor, not legal counsel. That the previous pastor is executor makes it seem to me that there is a history here of this woman drawing pastors in inappropriately. Trust your gut, and be wary.

2 - I would, again, be wary. Whenever only one person invites me into a situation, I hesitate with moving too far in. In the situation you describe, I would be disinclined to go any further. You have reached out to the mother - and she is already leaning on this previous pastor. You have reached out to the daughter, who has not offered much information but does remain an active member of your congregation. Personally, I would not try to get the two of them together to talk. You can't solve or fix this. If they both decide to involve you, that's different, but I certainly wouldn't initiate anything.

3 - Let the previous pastor play hero if he likes. The real role of pastor often feels inadequate. That's part of the grace of it - we are not the hero, the fixer, the solution, or the messiah. We are just the ones who listen, who pray, who walk along beside. We offer who we are and what we have - which is not professional counseling, social work, or legal counsel. 

4 - I may differ here from what others advise. Personally, I wouldn't mess with this. What you know about this woman's living situation, you know from her mother, who is known to be negative and who may not have accurately described the situation. Even if it is accurate, I would be extremely hesitant to ask a teacher to step down because she was living with a boyfriend. Unless you know the situation for a certainty, and unless there are clearly stated guidelines in your congregation about the expectations of teachers, I would recommend letting it go for now. I would focus my pastoral energy on getting to know the daughter and her situation, listening to her as she is willing to share, and discerning from there what a wise course (down the road!) might be.

This is a tough situation. Try to be clear about your own calling as pastor, which will require you to be patient with yourself and the situation, even when they are impatient for resolution. 

******************************************

Readers, what think you? There are plentiful red flags in this scenario, and the Matriarchs have done a great job pointing to them. We welcome additional thoughts in the comments. 

If you have a question for our panel, please send it to Ask the Matriarch. 

Wednesday Prayer: In Stress

Good morning, God

Today I need to remember
that I am not the pure center of the universe

and that you are sitting in that chair next to me

no matter the unexpected frustrations the day may throw at me

you are there

you will advise me on the best way to catch the Big Crazy Thing

you will cheer for me when I dismount the beam where I am balancing.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Image: Bruce Bane

Wednesday Festival: You Too?

One of the deep joys of community -- both online and in person community -- is the recognition that we are not alone in our experiences of the world. Yesterday in the RGBP Facebook group, for example, we learned that many of us have had the experience of receiving letters that begin, "Dear Pastor, you're going to hell..." On Saturdays during the RGBP Preacher Party, we share the experience of last-minute sermonizing. Knowing that we are not alone is life-sustaining!

As you skim the posts sampled below, consider dropping a note or posting a comment for the RevGal(or)Pal blogger simply to share in camaraderie: "You too?!"

+ Jo(e) is ready for summer; check out the blogged picture and see if you share a love for the same recreational water activity.

+ Brittany recalls a job opportunity that was coded to indicate "men only." Many of us will nod at our computer screens in commiseration.

+ Sarah is either packing or unpacking; my house, too, is about to be filled with numbered & labeled boxes as I prepare to move.

+ Related to Pentecost, Sandi asks what fires have been burning within us -- delighting us with new imagination, calling us to new places. How and where are you discerning God's movement in your life these days?

+ Like many of us, Joanna is praying for Moore, Oklahoma, in the aftermath of a devastating tornado.

+ Jenny watches her daughter sleep in a hospital bed, and reflects on the heartbreak of love that is parenthood.

+ Liz doesn't like fudge. I thought I was the only one! (Her blogpost is, in fact, a broader commentary on the General Assembly of the Church of Scotland, but it's the fudge that caught my attention.)

+ And Katherine is praying to St. Anthony for the rings she lost; if you see them, please let her know.

Blessings,
Rachel

Tuesday Prayer: God has your back.

...I will go before you
and level the mountains,
I will break in pieces the doors of bronze
and cut through the bars of iron,
I will give you the treasures of darkness
and riches hidden in secret places,
so that you may know it is I,
the Lord,
the One who calls you by your name.
Isaiah 45: 2-3.

Amen.

Tuesday Lectionary Leanings: 3-is-1, 1-is-3, Say WHAT?? New Math?? Edition

I once remember a joke about a gentlemen who much preferred attending worship on Trinity Sunday than Easter.  Why?  Because he figured any preacher worth her salt could try and explain the Resurrection.  But to explain the Trinity on the other hand........

Here is one attempt

As we approach Trinity Sunday, I suggest we need to start with prayer (OK I suggest we should always start with prayer, but when needing to preach on the unexplainable and seemingly nonsensical we REALLY should):

Holy God, Creation's Artist:
tiny infants
babble your praises,
     as you reach out
     and heal us with
          the touch of your fingertips.
We worship you.

Jesus Christ, Gateway to grace:
you make right
     what we have messed up;
you build your kingdom
     on the foundation of our faltering faith;
you stand with us
     in the midst of our suffering.
We adore you.

Holy Spirit, Playmate of justice:
you splash through
the sea-puddles
     in Eden's backyard,
tracking the mud
into Kingdom's kitchen,
     leading us to the Table.
We open our hearts to you.

God in Community, Holy in One,
hear us as we pray as Jesus taught us, saying,
Our Father. . .

(prayer source)

And now, back to planning worship...

The RCL readings for Trinity Sunday Year C can be found here

Where do you go with Trinity Sunday?  It is an odd thing.  The ecumenical community does not seem to have Sundays dedicated to other doctrines (although there are some that have given a whole chunk of Ordinary Time to Creation).  And frankly there are lots of other doctrines that are easier to preach and teach about than the Trinity.  Do you preach on the passages and ignore the idea of the doctrine?  DO you try to preach about what the doctrine means?  And what if you are not strongly Trinitarian???

Well that clarifies it....

The passages this year give us Proverbs and the nature of Wisdom/Sophia.  Or a Psalm about God's Sovereignty.  Or Paul talking about endurance and hope.  Or John's Jesus promising the gift of the Spirit at some future time.

Where is the Spirit that blew into our lectionary so noisily last Sunday blowing you this week?  What word of hope and Gospel do you have to share with folks this week?  What questions, ponderings, rants do you need to share with a supportive community?  Any of those and more can be found in the comments---but only if y'all put them there!

Monday Prayer: After the Fire

God of Pentecosts-

We have received from you an inheritance of fire, not of ashes.

You have breathed your Spirit into us and we have been born anew.

And now our raised hands look for your purpose.

Our feet look for your path.

We look to spend our inheritance as fools for your grace,

As fools in your grace.

As fools by your grace.

Amen.

Sunday Prayer (Pentecost)

Rush upon us.

Overtake and consume us,
O Holy Fire,

until divisions turn to dusty ashes

and walls of pride collapse.

Spill out over us.

Surround and overwhelm us,

O Satisfying Fountain,

until we waste love's richness

without measuring cost.

Dance among us.

Well up and erupt within us,

O Dynamic Word,

until our tongues know words of peace

and our souls speak reconciliation.

11th Hour Preacher Party: When you pray, move your feet!

 Recently I listened to an interview by Krista Tippett, "On Being," with Congressman John Lewis (originally broadcast the end of March 2013). The interview was so moving that I immediately bought Lewis' book, Across That Bridge, Life Lessons and a Vision for Change. 

Both the interview and the book conveyed Lewis' DEEP faith and his profound belief that the kingdom of God is already here, we just need to live into it. Every act of social justice is a step toward making real - within us and the world -  the reality of God's kingdom which is ALREADY present!

"Faith is being so sure of what the spirit has whispered in your heart that your belief in its eventuality is unshakable..."

Pentecost Sunday strikes me as the perfect day to celebrate this reality - that God's dream that all people have the means to live fully and equally because we are all made in God's image, made good to do good IS already a reality, all we have to do is live into it.

For me, this is what the Book of Acts ultimately conveys to us: in the giving of the Holy Spirit and the formation of the Church, God's desire that all creation love one another as God love's us is already a reality.

Lewis makes note of the training that Rosa Park's received prior to that fateful day when she refused to give up her bus seat:

"The new theology (Miles Horton) studied posited that faith should respond not only to the ethereal needs of humanity, but it should have a holistic impact on the lives of believers and on the communities in which they lived. If faith had power, he declared, then its ability should be challenged to answer even our physical and material concerns and not be reserved for religious services and activities. If faith had meaning, its benefits should accrue not only after death, but it should have the capacity to answer the cries of humanity here and now..."

 But of all the phrases I could quote in this very moving book perhaps my favorite is this African saying:

"When you pray, move your feet!"

On this day when we celebrate the birth of the Church, what aspect of the Holy Spirit is tugging at you? Where are you feeling called to move your feet? What text is the Holy Spirit whispering in and through your heart?

This is the 11th Hour Preacher Party. Let's dance together through this day as we seek the words to speak into the cries of humanity and remind our people, as we make a wish and blow out the birthday candles, that

"Life is like a drama, and any person who is truly committed to an ideal must believe in the authority of a divine plan. Not a rigid, micromanagement of human behavior that predicts every step of every individual, but a set of divine boundaries that governs the present, the past, and the future—a set of principles humankind does not have the capacity to override, no matter how far we attempt to stray from its dictates."

Pull up a chair, here's a mug...would you like coffee or tea? And, thank you ALL for the gifts of your presence that you bring and share with this party.

Friday Five: Be on your way

RevGal Jan is under the weather, so we are swapping weeks for the Friday Five. (Feel better, Jan!) Actually, I want to thank her because she inspired me when she recently shared this poem by Rumi:

It's your road, and yours alone.

Others may walk it with you,

but no one can walk it for you.

A road in Bavaria.

I reflected on this poem for a while and thought about some new "roads" that my progeny are beginning. Both are graduating (one from high school, one from college). I am also looking at a possible new "road" in a much hoped-for job. It's been a winding path to get this point!

So in thinking about our life's journey, and the rhythm of our lives, here's five questions on this theme...

1. What "road" is in your immediate future? 

2. Where have you been "traveling" a lot lately -- and are you going back there? 

3.  Who are your fellow travelers? 

4.  Who are the unintentional companions (or hitchhikers) that you find on the road with you? 

5.  As a family, we always recite "the traveler's prayer" -- a tongue-in-cheek petition as we pull out of the driveway ("Lord, whatever we have forgotten, may it not be important!") What have you forgotten lately, and did it matter?

BONUS: Share a photo of a road you've traveled. Or of traveling companions who have made the journey special. Or perhaps there's a song or another poem that suits your journey. If so, please share!

Please let us know if you play by adding your link in the comments! We'd love to journey with you! :)
Use this format to include your post's URL:
<a href="the url of your blog post goes here">what you want the link to say goes here</a>.


P.S. This is a busy week for our family! I'll be in and out all day, but will make sure I catch up with everyone who posts by Saturday!

Thursday Prayer

"Lord Jesus, come into my heart; pray in me and with me; so that I may learn from you how to pray."

~Mother Teresa

Ask the Matriarch -- Moving Toward Moving On

For those of us in denominations with a search and call process, there comes that awkward moment when we feel called away, but not yet called to a new setting. How do you remain faithful in ministry while moving toward moving on? Here is this week's question:

 

I have served my church as pastor for 8 years.  It's the first church I've served.  Three years ago, I thought it might be time to move on, but the timing just was not right.  We were in the middle of some serious conflict, and while I really wanted to quit, it was not the right time.  In the past 6 months or so, I've been clear in my heart that it is time to move on now.  So, I've entered 'search and call' with my denomination, and I'm what they call "in circulation."  Kind of like a library book.  Anyway, now that I have come to the decision to leave, that's all I think about.  It's making me feel increasingly discontent and restless.  It is hard to find my mojo on Sunday mornings - writing sermons is like pulling teeth from an alligator, and Lord, committee meetings now are the worst!  I just don't want to do any of it.  I have to force myself.  My question is this:  while waiting on a new call, do you have any hints on maintaining your spiritual health in order to faithfully serve in your current call?

Here are some thoughts from Muthah+, blogging at Stone of Witness: 

Yes, I have known this malaise. I have even left a parish without a next call--I do not recommend this. It isn't good for them and it certainly isn't good for your career.

  

The best advice I can give is relax!  Right at the moment your head is in your next call even if you don't know what that is.  You have an obligation to your present community of faith.  You have fought the good fight with them.  In your prayer ask for the gift to stay present to your present flock until you leave.  Do your best to prepare them for that which comes next without making apparent that your are leaving.  Get some advice from a professional interim or some of our RevGals on preparing the congregation for your leaving.  

For you, the congregation is no longer the one to whom you are called---that is ok.  We all have to preach to those to whom we are not called at times.  It is also when we can be the most pastoral or the most prophetic.  Your role has changed and that may give you a different way of looking at your work in the congregation.  Becoming a bit more detached may just give you what you need to survive until the next call.  And in your preaching remember you are not preaching TO them.  You are revealing Christ to the world--that you must do whether you are called there or not.  

The more intuitive in the parish will know something is going on but keep your counsel until you have been called somewhere else.  A parish always feels betrayed when their pastor leaves even for retirement.  

I always felt that the position of pastor or priest was always a 'flash in the pan' in the life of a congregation.  So I always tried to prepare the parish for the pastor's leaving while I was still called there.  It is sort of like the parent who knows that they don't get to 'keep' their children.  They constantly have to be prepared to push them out of the nest.  The congregation has to be constantly encouraged to take on the pastor's duties, to take on the ministry for the sake of the whole community, etc.  This new work may take the edge off your wanting to be somewhere else.  Meanwhile, prayers ascend.

We welcome Jan Edmiston back to the Matriarchs panel; her blog is A Church for Starving Artists:

As you are preparing to leave, this is a good time to prepare your current congregation to be led by someone new.  Are they equipped to continue ministry without you?  Are there specific people you might mentor to prepare them for the day you leave?

I find it helpful to pray for the unknowns:  for your next congregation to be prepared to welcome you, for the next pastor of your current congregation that she/he will serve them well, and for you to carry on until that next call is revealed, that you would be prepared for your next community.

Blessings in this search.

Jennifer, blogging at An Orientation of Heart, offers a few quick, practical questions:

Have you taken all of your continuing education time? Now might be a very good time to nurture your soul with a great class, workshop, retreat or week away with some great books. If you have the time coming, I would definitely look in to taking it.

Have you made a list or written in your journal about what you do appreciate about your current call?  Thinking with intention and praying about what, if anything, sustains you where you are might be a good exercise.

The Alban Institute has great publications on leaving well. And while you are discerning a new call and not yet leaving, you’re mentally preparing to leave. Reading some of their books or articles might prove to be helpful.

Do you have a spiritual director? Perhaps checking in with someone new or familiar would be helpful right now.

All the best to you in this season of waiting and wondering…

*************************************************

Readers, if you have thoughts to add, please share them in the comments. 

We'll be back next week with another question. Could you use a word from the Matriarchs? Email us: Ask the Matriarch. 

Wednesday Festival--Inspiration Edition

As I was reading through the RevGal blogosphere this morning I was truly inspired.

Kristin at Liberation Theology Lutheran actually made me miss being "the pastor" as she shared pictures of the gorgeous creations she and her church created at their Create In Me Retreat.  Check it out--it's a beautiful witness to creativity in church and how everyone can participate.

Jan at The Painted Prayerbook offers a moving blessing for Pentecost.  

Gord at Following Frodo shares his perspective altering experience of his local Chairleaders' Event.  

Lastly, Teri asks the important question, "Are pastors basically “umbrella realignment specialists”?"  Really, head over to Clever Title Here to see what she means—it’ll be worth your while! 

Wednesday Prayer: Conscientious Objector

May 15 is observed by many as International Conscientious Objector's Day.  

Conscientious Objector

I shall die, but
that is all that I shall do for Death.
I hear him leading his horse out of the stall;
I hear the clatter on the barn-floor.
He is in haste; he has business in Cuba,
business in the Balkans, many calls to make this morning.
But I will not hold the bridle
while he clinches the girth.
And he may mount by himself:
I will not give him a leg up.

Though he flick my shoulders with his whip,
I will not tell him which way the fox ran.
With his hoof on my breast, I will not tell him where
the black boy hides in the swamp.
I shall die, but that is all that I shall do for Death;
I am not on his pay-roll.

I will not tell him the whereabout of my friends
nor of my enemies either.
Though he promise me much,
I will not map him the route to any man's door.
Am I a spy in the land of the living,
that I should deliver men to Death?
Brother, the password and the plans of our city
are safe with me; never through me
Shall you be overcome.

 

Edna St. Vincent Millay

a Tuesday prayer...

...for this real-ness of life,
I give thanks.

...for the torti cat watching me pray this prayer, with half open eyes, purring loudly, waiting for me to finish so that she might jump on my lap,
I give thanks.

...for the delicious dinner out last evening, complete with coconut tofu sticks and fig and gorgonzola pizza and vegan shepherd's pie, with good wine, and amazing, amazing women who make Sunday School happen at my church,
I give thanks, and PRAISE, and awe.

...for the tiny two and half year old child who touched my glittery scarf two nights ago and said, "I loooove your scarf" and then took off his sandals to run barefoot through the room,
I give thanks, and smile.

...for the 15 and a half year old blind, deaf, loud, incontinent poodle snoring at my feet,
I give thanks, (and pray for patience)--

Sometimes, I think, I need Your presence.
And then I remember,
in the real-ness of life,
you are Everpresent.

Sometimes, I wonder what the heck it is I am doing here, where the heck am I going,
and then
You remind me,
to Be All Here.
In the real-ness of life.
and,
I give thanks...
and remember to consider the lilies.

Amen.

Tuesday Lectionary Leanings: Many Tongues Edition

Happy Birthday to you,

Happy Birthday to you,

Happy Birthday dear (divided, fractious, sometimes [often?] disappointing) church.

Happy birthday to you!!!!

OR maybe a more formal prayer?

Spirit God,

blow into our lives,

move us to action,

break down the walls that separate us.

Where our language divides, offer us translation.

Where our fear overcomes, fill us with the fire of courage.

Where our lives are becalmed, fill our sails with wind,

moving us forward into the unknown future.

Fill us with the hope and promise of Pentecost!

Amen.

 Yes indeed we have reached the end of the Easter season.  The great 50 days are over (or will be soon anyway).  And it is time for the early church to move from a small private movement sharing their stories and memories to a quickly growing movement that will, eventually, conquer the Empire [only to become a new Empire itself, but  perhaps that is a chapter for another day].  Pentecost is here!

You can read the Pentecost readings for Year C here.

The powers that be give us an interesting pairing of readings this year in the RCL cycle.  The tower of Babel and the Pentecost story.  Language divided and the divisions of language overcome.  Is this the equation the writer of Luke-Acts was intending?  Or is this an overlay we have added in later years?

or the same language as usual--just louder

As I write this I remember the role of the Babel-fish plays in The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy (and of course the website of the same name)  Surely there is a sermonic connection to be made there????

Or maybe you are tired of hearing (and preaching) about people speaking in many tongues every year.  So is this the year you preach on John's Jesus promising to send the spirit of truth that the world can not receive?

WE could use some peace

What does Pentecost worship look like in your context?  Will people wear red?  Wave ribbons?  Will you open the windows and let the wind blow through?  Last Sunday after worship this area was hit by a microburst with winds up to 102 kph (about 64 moh) which left a trail of destruction in its wake.  Is that the sort of wind that blows through the church on Pentecost?  (and what about the fire....)

Share ideas, ponderings, confusions et al in the comments...

Blog Contributors Wanted - Narrative Lectionary

RevGalBlogPals will be adding a Narrative Lectionary discussion feature this fall. Because the NL is relatively new and resources are less common than those for the RCL, we want to generate useful content as well as providing a place to discuss preaching on Narrative Lectionary. Contributors could expect to spend some time preparing a post with a

preaching approach to the text, then inviting others to share their thoughts in the comments. We will determine the schedule and format once we gauge the interest of volunteers. It could range from a "month on, month off" commitment (such as Tuesday Lectionary Leanings or Ask the Matriarch) to a once monthly commitment (such as Wednesday Festival).

If you are preaching from the Narrative Lectionary and might like to provide reflections on the texts and host discussions, let us know either here in the comments or by sending an email to RevGalBlogPals.

Monday Prayer: Lord, grant us eyes to see

Lord, grant us eyes to see
Within the seed a tree,
Within the glowing egg a bird,
Within the shroud a butterfly:
Till taught by such, we see
Beyond all creatures thee,
And hearken for thy tender word
And hear it, "Fear not: it is I."

             - Christina Rossetti